The Axe Effect
by weapons kunoichi Xx
Summary: A new fragrance for men, Axe, has ended up as Shikamaru’s Christmas present from his nagging mom. He decides to try it out. Full summary inside. Tenten X Shikamaru. Slight Hinata X Naruto, Temari X Shikamaru, and Ino X Shikamaru


The Axe Effect.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto…or do I?

Jk.

A/N. My first one-shot! Go easy on me in the reviews…xP

Summary: A new fragrance for men, Axe, has ended up as Shikamaru's Christmas present from his nagging mom. "You need to get out more!" He decides to try it out, but why are all the girls following him? Also, Ino and Temari are acting a bit out of it… Tenten X Shikamaru. Slight Hinata X Naruto, Temari X Shikamaru, and Ino X Shikamaru.

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Crinkle, crinkle.

"Oh, gee. Thanks, Otou-san. Another shogi board!" an unenthusiastic voice exclaimed, trying to sound ecstatic.

"Shikamaru, you could at least look put some more effort in looking happy," whined his father.

"Well, I already have about eighteen of these for birthdays and Christmases. I don't really need another one."

"Well, if you would make some wish lists every now and then!" nagged Okaa-san. "Here, open mine," she sighed.

"Making a wish list would be too troublesome." Then, facing the present, "This better not be another shogi board, or I might just quit playing it altogether."

Unwrapping the present, Shikamaru was a bit taken aback at how small the present was, compared to the box it was packaged in.

"What's this? Axe body spray?"

"Well, I was going to buy you a kunai set, but there was a merchant on the street, saying that this helps guys get girlfriends. After all, you need to get out more!"

"Aagh…how troublesome."

It was six o' clock, and they had just finished their Christmas dinner.

For their Christmas desert that night, Shikamaru's mom was going to bake a batch of brownies, but she couldn't find the mix.

"Shikamaru! Go down to the store and get some more brownie mix!"

"Troublesome mother…" he mumbled, as he put on his jacket.

"And get the extra fudgey kind, too!!"

As Shikamaru was about to walk out the door, he spotted the present his mother got him.

Sighing, after a tussle with his conscience, he decided to spray some on.

As he went to the market, he bumped into Ino on the way.

Literally. He was staring at the darkening sky, seeking out the stars or leftover clouds.

WHACK!

He smacked into a grumbling Ino.

"Hey! You lazy-ass teammate! Watch where you're going! No need for a bum like you to make my Christmas even worse!"

Then, she muttered to herself, "First, I get kicked out of the house for --"

As she was muttering, she seemed to be on the verge of breaking out into tears, for her voice was breaking, her nose started to turn red, and her eyes watered, but the moment she sniffed, her face completely changed direction, and she leered at Shikamaru seductively.

"O-oh! Sh-Shikamaru-kun! G-gomen-ne, eh? S-so, why are you out here?" she whispered sexily, leaning towards him as she spoke, with a faint blush.

"O-oi, Ino…y-you okay?"

Shikamaru backed up uncomfortably.

"Why, of course! How sweet of you to be so concerned!" she squealed, giggling like an idiot.

She looked away, and then faced him again.

"So, who are you spending Christmas with? I was hoping, maybe, just maybe, I could spend it with you?"

"I-I'm spending the holidays with my family."

"O-oh. Well, if there's any change in plans, you know who to call!"

"Um, okay…"

Suddenly, Ino snuggled up close to Shikamaru, and, smirking, hissed in his ear, "Oh, how I hope there's a change in plans," followed by a giggle.

Pushing Ino off, he ran faster than he had ever before.

"WellI'mheadingtothestoreforsomebrowniemixokaybye!!" he screeched, on the verge of yelling for his mommy.

"M-m-merry Christmas, Sh-shika-kun!!" shouted her distant voice.

"Oof!"

Just as Shikamaru escaped the claws of one troublesome woman, another one glomps him!

"Aah! Shikamaru! You lazy bum!" shouted an enthusiastic voice, sounding all a bit too familiar…

"Temari!"

"Yess?"

"What are you doing here?"

"Well, I just thought that I would visit the only person that cares for me during Christmas!" she pouted, making puppy eyes, and hugging him.

Apparently, Temari had already fallen for the Axe Effect the moment Shikamaru ran away from Ino, just five feet away.

"Now, what were you doing with that witch, Ino?"

"She's my teammate…"

"Yeah, whatever! Anyways, I was thinking. I'm treating you to Ichiraku's for a hearty Christmas dinner!" she proclaimed, grinning like mad.

"Well, I already…kinda…already ate dinner with my family."

Backing away, Temari acted hurt, with her cheeky smile replaced by a sorrowful pouted frown.

"F-fine, then. I-I guess… (-sniffff-) y-you just d-don't wanna be around me anymore," she cried, just barely squeaking out the last five words.

"Troublesome woman…" was murmured under the twelve-year-old's breath.

Then, he laid a hand on her shoulder, and grumbled, "It's not that. It's just that I need to buy my mom some brownie mix, and if I don't hurry up, she's going to nag at me some more."

"W-well, what am I gonna do?" blurred Temari. "I came all the way over to see my boyfri—best friend (bluusssssh), and eat my Christmas dinner with him, but you don't even have time!"

Sighing, he sympathized her by saying, "You know what? How about this? I'll go buy my brownie mix, and I'll invite you over to make brownies with us. After, you can eat the desert with me and my family, and if you'd like, I'll take you for some tea after that."

"Oh, thank you!!" she cried out, almost choking the poor genius.

"Come on!"

And with that, Temari dragged Shikamaru to the store.

Hinata, who exited the store about thirty seconds before Shikamaru crashed into Ino, saw the scene.

"I wonder why Ino and Temari are so infatuated over him so suddenly. Last time I checked, Ino resented him for being so lazy, and Temari was like an older sister to him, but with the "annoying younger brother" attitude towards him."

She placed her groceries in a corner, and followed Shikamaru, with Temari clinging onto his arm, into the store.

When she got three feet within range, she inhaled some of Shikamaru's cologne.

It seemed…familiar, somehow.

Then she remembered! That was the cologne Neji-nii-san used! Hiashi-sama had requested that he used it. Why, though? That was what Hinata couldn't remember, even after racking her brains for the data, trying to recall the reason.

Ah! He said something about improving social skills, then mumbled something about "getting a girl" and…"making grandchildren?"

…

That was about five months ago. At first, everybody loved the smell, and people enjoyed hugging him just for it, even though her stoic cousin detested the embraces. After a while, though, people got used to it, and soon, they acted the same around him.

Tapping Shikamaru on the shoulder, she recoiled at the overprotective glare Temari gave.

"Eh? Oi, Hinata? What brings you here?"

"A-ano…I-I was j-just about to a-ask you the same qu-question."

"I'm buying some brownie mix. Troublesome kaa-san wants to bake a batch of brownies, but she can't find the mix. I'm here to buy some more."

"O-oh. I-I was going t-to b-buy some groceries f-for N-Naruto-kun. I w-was going to c-cook him C-Christmas d-dinner, s-since he doesn't have a-anyone to sh-share the h-holidays w-with."

"That's nice. You can run along now, and buy your groceries," snarled Temari.

"O-oh. Th-then, s-sayonara."

Hinata rushed out to pick up her groceries, and hurried over to Naruto's place. She was going to cook him something other than ramen for dinner! Something healthy and gourmet, like the chefs from the household make!

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During the entire time at the grocery store, Temari was busy warding off fangirls, but made sure Shikamaru didn't suspect a thing. There was no way she would let them near her precious Shikamaru-kun!

After Shikamaru picked an extra fudge brownie mix, they headed for the counter to check out.

Beep!

The brownie mix was scanned along the counter.

"Here you go, Shikamaru!" rang an angelic voice.

Looking up, Shikamaru faced Tenten.

She looked beautiful in Shikamaru's eyes. She was wearing her hear down, and a red Santa hat.

A red velvet sleeve-less dress with white fur coming out of her sleeves and at the bottom of the skirt, which ended just a little past her knees, created most of her outfit. Matching velvet gloves that reached four inches past her elbows and suede red ankle boots concluded her ensemble.

Shikamaru couldn't stop staring.

Before Tenten spoke to him and made him look up, Shikamaru was formulating plans to keep Temari away from ruining his Christmas. Not that Temari was annoying, but he really would rather spend time with his family, something he had not done in a while. Also, Temari's clinginess wasn't a pro, either. (you know, the pros and cons list?)

"T-Tenten? Is th-that you? I-I didn't know you w-worked here!"

"You? That little squirt from the Chuunin exams?'

Wincing a bit from the memory, she faced Temari.

"Um, yeah. That would be me. Hey, Temari. Hey, Shikamaru."

"Actually, I don't think anybody knows. I hope nobody does…especially him," she started, but whispered that last part so softly that it was barely audible.

"I started about a month ago, because I needed to save up for the Christmas present rush, when you spend so much money on buying everyone presents, you know?"

Shikamaru squirmed queasily a little, feeling guilty, because he hasn't bought anybody presents, other than his parents, and they had only received a ten-dollar gift card each for the hot springs, nothing really fancy.

"Anyway, something came up, and the person who was supposed to be working this shift couldn't come. I had to be the replacement, last minute. Don't tell anybody that I'm working here, okay? I don't want…him…to find out."

"Him? Aww, puny Half-Pint has a cruuuush!!"

Blushing, she replied, "Oh, be quiet!"

"Who is it? Tell me!!"

"Alright, Temari. Since you're visiting, you, hopefully, might not tell! But do you promise?"

"Cross my heart, hope to die, stick a needle in my eye!"

"…um, I hope you don't really. Haha, naah, I know what you mean!"

Tenten leaned over and whispered a name in Temari's ear.

Shikamaru discreetly focused chakra into his ears, enabling him to hear her.

Not that he cared. He was just…curious.

"Hyuuga Neji!"

Tenten blushed furiously as she leaned back.

Shikamaru paid for the mix, and left with a plastic bag in his hand..

As they left, there were about a billion rustles in the bushes and trees, accompanied by whispers and giggles.

"…Shikamaru, since when did you have fangirls?" 

"…run."

Just then, as he predicted, a swarm of fangirls herded out and chased Shikamaru, shouting, "BACK OFF!! SHIKA-KUN IS MINE!" "IN YOUR DREAMS, UGLY BUTT!!" "SHIKAMAAAARUUU!!!!" "I LOVE HIM MORE!!" "NO WAY!! I DO!!" "HE'S MY MAN!!" "NUH-UH!! HE'S MINE!!" "I LUFFS YOU, SHIKA-KUN!!" "WILL YOU MARRY ME?"

Shikamaru lost Temari to the crowd during his run, but he didn't have the will to save her.

("It would be too troublesome…")

Out of the blue, group by group, the girls were knocked unconscious.

"Wha…the…?"

"Dun, dundun, dun, dun, dun, DUUN!!! Tenten to the rescue!" shouted Tenten, with a cheeky grin.

"How did you do that?"

"I do it to all of Neji's fangirls. It's really not that hard! They look really dangerous, because they're in huge amounts, but they're actually really weak."

"…"

"Anyway, my shift is done."

Dragging a large sack with her, she left, headed for Ino's house.

She left a present on the doorstep, then rang the bell. She jumped atop her rooftop, and she headed off to all of her friends' houses, planning to leave anonymous gifts on their doorsteps. She had even planned out a route.

"Oh, wait! Shikamaru! Here's your gift. I thought I might as well give it to you now, since you already know my game of secret Santa."

She handed him a neatly wrapped present, then headed off.

"Tenten!"

"Yeah?" she asked, as she whipped around.

The moment she did, she heard a whisper, "Merry Christmas," as Shikamaru's lips locked against hers.

(here's a pause for you to go 'aww!!')

…

(still silence…)

It was brief, almost a peck.

Even so, Tenten blushed hard, and quickly jumped to the nearest rooftop, rushing off.

Shikamaru sighed, looking around at the girls who were knocked out.

"I don't care about all these girls. I don't need fangirls. All I want for Christmas is you, Tenten…"

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A/N. Yeah, these author's notes probably ruin the moment, sorry!

Anyway, this is my first Shikamaru X Tenten fic, and it's also my first oneshot.

Tell me what you think! Review, pleeeaase?


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